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Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Coffee Flavored Coffee

For all those who like hazelnut, fluffy bunny coffee this post is for you too.

I was over at All Things Jennifer and she had a crummy day because she left her fresh brewed mug of java at home. Made me reminisce about my first day at EDS.

I rolled in to the center and was directed to a back conference room where we all gathered our chairs into a circle. Katie, the Kelly Services lady, gave us all plastic coffee mugs. I run back to the break room for some caffeine. I was feeling real rough that day. I wasn't used to having to be at work at eight on the dot. My old job at Lexmark had flex time where I could come in anytime between seven and nine and all I had to do was work my eight hours. About the only nice thing about that job.

It was my first time in the break room and survey my surroundings. There were two big machines that must brew a thousand gallons at a time. I jest but they are pretty big. Then there was a little intuitional machine that has the glass carafes. I'm looking around trying to figure out why they have this little guy when there are two big ones right beside. I'm thinking decaf but none of the carafes had orange handles. For those not savvy in coffee making etiquette that means decaf and brown means "full on I need to wake up" caffeine. I poured some coffee from the little guy thinking it would be fresher. Stirred in my customary two sugars. Tasted pretty good.

I sat in training bored to tears as most people would be during that first day when you are just going over the obvious basics. For the life of me I couldn't wake up. I tried my best. More coffee. Constant movement in the chair. And even trying to pay attention and contribute. Nothing. I had 4 cups of coffee that day that half way through the afternoon I had to piss like a race horse. I was ecstatic when five o'clock rolled around. I had enough.

The next day I zombie-walk to the break room and low-and-behold there was a big ass sign that said. Wait for it. DECAF. How in the hell did I miss that. In my mind I shouted, "Fuck!"

Be sure to check out Dennis Leary's "Rescue Me" on FX. Season Two starting soon.