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Monday, January 31, 2005

Baby Mooley is Born

There has been much anticipation over at the Tier 1 Help Desk. The great Mooley's baby was getting read to be born. Mooley and the other Tier 1 agents infect me with those damn internet quizzes that I post. After a bit of delay John Brandon was born January 26, 2004 at 5:02 PM. He weighed 8 lbs. 9 oz and is 20 inches long. I must say I always get a chuckle that we measure the length of a baby. Anyway. Mooley has sent up a blog to chronicle the early childhood of young John Brandon. Go check it out.

Hottie of the Week

Here we have the lovely Strawberry-Shortcake from Out of Character. I had requested a picture of herself to use for Hottie of the Week. This is what she sent me.

She was a redneck bride for Halloween on year. I told you sweetie I was going to use the picture. Enjoy.

Friday, January 28, 2005

Give It To Me, Baby

(A) First, recommend to me:
1. a movie:
2. a book:
3. a musical artist, song, or album:

(B) I want everyone who reads this to ask me three questions, no more, no less. Ask me anything you want.

(C) Then I want you to go to your blog, copy and paste this allowing your friends to ask you anything they want!
I will answer the questions on Wednesday.

Let Me Hear Your Battle Cry

The tradition has started. Those of us who work at EDS in Winchester, KY are gathering at the Paddy Wagon Irish Pub to complete our Beer Cards. Anyone who would like to join us on Thursday nights is more than welcome too. The Emperor should be with us next week since he is moving up to the Richmond area from BFE.

I was talking to my friend blinkingbeauty about how lately I have been a magnet for shitty food service. There was the server arguing with me about a tab. Last sunday my parents took me out to dinner for my birthday and we all didn't get our food at the same time and my brother's was cold. My roommate,Dave, and I had to wait about 5+ minutes for someone at the Mexican retaruant to get our drink orders. We ate all of our chips before someone came. Then last night at Paddy Wagon our server wasn't as attentive to our needs as she should have been.

It was nice that Kristi, our server, remembered that we had been there. Paddy Wagon seemed to have had a slighty larger crown than last week. Our poor server was run ragged and in particular our progression of alcohol suffered. Dave and I had to wait after we finished our beer to order another one. Jerry showed up a little later and once he ordered his beer had to wait 5+ minutes to get it. Kristi realized that she never stopped back by and said, "I just bought that one." See fucker at Shamrock's that how you make up for being a dumbass. Hell we even had to wait to pay for our tabs. Kristi stopped to talk to us and introduced herself. That's how I know her name now. Cute girl too. I told her I don't think it's her fault and explained the odd karma I have been having. Kristi we had a great night.

I took another quiz. I think this one is fitting for the next time I'm drinking.

what's your battle cry? | | merchandise!

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Maybe This Will Explain It

Wackiness: 72/100
Rationality: 44/100
Constructiveness: 56/100
Leadership: 44/100

You are a WECF--Wacky Emotional Constructive Follower.
This makes you a Candle burning at both ends.

You work until you drop, and you play until you can stand to work again. You have so much enthusiasm that you can find it hard to control on your own, and you appreciate the guidance that channels your energy and lets you be your best.

In a relationship, you require lots of attention and support. You often over-contribute and end up feeling depleted and cheated. You may benefit from more time alone than you grant yourself.

Your driving force is the emotional support of others--especially affection. You can run on empty for miles if you have positive energy behind you. Without it--as it occasionally must run dry--you are depressive, listless, and difficult to motivate.

You need a lot of affection. Get it any way you can, but never at the cost of your self-respect or well-being.

Take the Quiz

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

American Pie Moment

I shall strive to delve deeper into my moments of sexual frustration.

Since my roommate and I carpool to work we usually take lunch at the same time to facility each other’s lazy asses not having to walk anywhere. Now as of late EDS has been employing some rather attractive women. One of these said hotties was walking down the walkway between cubes. I proceeded to hump the cubical wall as Mini-me did in Austin Powers. It was so feverish that I knocked over Deacon Peck's pop cap tower. I apologized and walked out the door.

Dave out of the blue said Arby's for lunch. I was like sure thing I like Arby's. Usually we go to the same places every week. Lunch was unspectacular but I was still hungry, so I went up to the counter and purchased a Cherry Turnover. I sat down and took a little bite just to make sure it wasn't too hot. Then another. I looked at my roommate, "Ah, warm and flaky." "Look at this thing. It looks like a pussy." There my cherry turnover became and object of lust. I had eaten about half of it and the top of the triangle was still there. Looked like an engorged clit. The flaky crust looked like the folds of the labia. It even had a warm pink gooey center.

I ate more. Some of the filling was oozing out. I took my finger and just dabbed that up. Yummy. Every moment was ecstasy. A pastry never tasted so good.

Would a woman please rescue me?

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Forecast: Uncertain

The Winning-Loser finds it necessary to continue to encourage me on my quest to find someone to love. The reason he finds this hilarious is because he DM's my Wednesday D&D group at the local shop, the Fun*Asylum. More often than not our side tracted conversations revolve around sex and relationships. Could stem from the fact that I play an extremely sexual elven bard (female), and many a time the game just dissolves into mindless perverted dribble. Fun none-the-less.

Moving on. I have no shame and recounted details of my sex life. I explained that when Mike gets some lovin' it's like a monsoon. When it rains it pours. Just like in 'Forrest Gump' when Tom Hanks remarks about the rain coming down in big drops, small drops, and even from up underneath. Much is my sex life. Just in the movie that rain abruptly ends, and I go through a dry spell. Sometimes a lengthy dry spell.

Those that were in that conversation that night have liken to calling me Dry Spell. Winning-Loser just likes to chide me. Me? I'm enjoying bachelorhood. Soon the rainy season will come again, and I will whaller in it like a pig in slop.

Ten on Tuesday

Ten Things that You Love About Winter

1) Seeing your breath in the air
2) Snowball Fights
3) Movie nights by a crackling fire
4) Cuddling by that fire
5) Sticking my cold nose on people
6) Watching snow flakes dance in the wind
7) Kicking icicles off of cars
8) Blankets to keep me warm at night – I called it the Blanket Burrito
9) Full beam headlights - hehe
10) Drinking Fuzzy Navels when the campus was snowed in – memories

Monday, January 24, 2005

Augh More Testing

Kip Dynamite
(Please rate my quiz)

Which Napoleon Dynamite character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hottie of the Week

This week's Hottie is the lovely Alessandra Ambrosio. Hailing the from that sunny South American nation of Brazil. Alessandra currently is a Victoria's Secret Angel and has been busy with the "Angels Across America" campaign. It's she the cutiest thing ever?

Be sure to check out this fan site for more luscious pictures of Alessandra.

Friday, January 21, 2005


I want to thank everyone for the birthday wishes. I had an incredible time. My mom called me on the way home from work and told me she had pizza and ice cream cake. My dad is out of town on business that's why that was kinda lame. We are going out Sunday for lunch to celebrate. I took my brother back to the dorms and picked up my roommate, Dave, and headed out to Paddy Wagon's.

Paddy Wagon's is a little Irish bar about as Irish as something in KY can get. I guess it's Irish because they serve Guiness and Harp. When I was growing up the place was this hole-in-the-wall Mexican joint. Supposedly it was pretty good but it looked so dirty. Anyway. Paddy Wagon has this thing called the "Beer Card". On it are all the beers that they serve. If you drink all of them you get your name on the bar. Now that is the coolest.

We met a buddy and co-worker there, and I started off with a Red Stripe. Our server was too sweet she made us Beer Cards, even marked on mine the beers I had from the last time I was there and never got a card made. She even offered me a shot for my birthday. A Serria Nevada and a Coors Light later we are shooting the shit about work, lusting after the hotties at work, and wondering when they are gonna hire our asses full-time.

Our server told us last call was in a few minutes. I sat there contemplating if I wanted another beer. I said, "Shit, it's my birthday." Our server said, "You still want your shot." "Yeah." "What do you want, tequila?" "Oh god no. I only drink tequila if it's in a margarita. Make it Jager."

Then I said, "Might as well get this one over with. Give me a PBR." "We are out of Pabst. Here if you want the nastiest stuff we got. It's the Dixie Voodoo." "OK"

I got my Jager and realized I should have asked for some Red Bull. Jager Bombs, baby. I got my Red Bull and my Dixie Voodoo. Pounded my Jager Bomb down. Augh, that beer tasted like soap. Our server didn't even charge me for the last beer or the Red Bull. I tried to make her fix it, but she wouldn't. Paddy Wagon's is going to become a Thursday tradition. Finished that swill off and we headed out.

Just as we were arriving home our next door neighbors, two hot sorority girls, were getting out of their car. We had some pleasantries at the door as Dave stalled opening the door. Good man. For a brief second we needed to get the nerve up, I grabbed the half case of Rolling Rock and headed next door. Knocked. "Who is it?" "The Neighbors." The sober one answers the door, "We are partied out." Damn. Cock blocked by the DD.

Ah. It was a good night people. But the true festivities are next weekend, when I have my January Birthdays Bash. If you are gonna be in the area on the twenty-ninth be sure to stop by.


I want to pimp a friend of mine's artwork. I'll let this bit of lineart speak for his immense talent.

Please visit his website. There he has more sample sketches and a script for his first issue. Mock regularly posts sketches in the forum. Check him out and give him your support.

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Happy Birthday to Me

That's right bitches. It's my birthday and you better send me all kinds of birthday cheer. Also, send the Emperor some birthday cheer too. We have the same birthday.

I got home from work last night and there was a flyer in the door for special offers from the cable company. I looked at my roommate and just laughed. I guess they didn't know they were still giving us cable. For Free.

After getting home from playing D&D, I plopped down on the couch to watch some TV. Snow. Damn. They found us. I guess this is my birthday present from the cable company.

Pay up sucker.

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

Must Have

Here is one more nail in the coffin to make me go out and buy an Xbox. I was at, my buddy, Jason's place last Sunday, watching the Eagles/Vikings game. On that big 51" Widescreen TV, a commercial for LucasArt's Mercenaries came on. Jaws dropped. What can you say when it has tag lines like this:

You are a mercenary.
In a playground of destruction.
Hijack any vehicle.
Use any weapon.
Blow up anything.
Blow it up again.
Keep blowing stuff up.
Blow the living crap out of it.
Blow the living crap out of it some more.

Here is a screen capture from the Xbox.

Jason simply said, "I have a boner."

Conspiracies in the Workplace

No this isn't another rant about the restrooms.

The Emperor has taken it upon himself to let everyone know that I seem to look like Bobby Hill. Now the dominatrix, I'm not so sure about that one. Bobby, I can handle. The running joke is, "Asking me, 'How the propane sales are going?'" Hey it's funny. It's good to be loved. I have to say my co-workers have gone over the top with this joke. They got the supervisor involved and created me an actual badge. See below.

How do your co-workers show you that they love you?

Tuesday, January 18, 2005


Came back from the Mexican restaurant today, bloated as usual. It's 20% Off Day on Tuesdays. My roommate noticed I had what appeared to be a busted belt in my tire. Hmm. Then I notice that I got a big ol' screw in the tread as well. I guess it paid to get that Road Hazard warranty from S&S Tire.

A few months back I was replacing all my tired because well I got a flat tire. They needed to be replaced anyway. I was just wearing them out to extend the time that I needed to replace them. The sales clerk mentioned the Road Hazard warranty like a good little monkey. I had to think if this was worth it. Then I recalled my horrible luck with vehicles and then even narrowed it down to tires and it got worse.

Let's start with my old 88 Chevy Nova. I was driving back from Scout Camp with my brother and I had picked up some tiny remnant of a nail. It had begun to rain and I was going around a turn and lost control. Spun around three times and ended up falling backwards into a huge ditch. Had to have a tow truck pull me out. Five feet either way I could have driven myself out. Later in college, someone slashed both my driver's side tires. Hell I even had someone steal the spare tire out of the back of the trunk of that car.

Then my parents gave me the 92 Nissan truck. Early after graduating I was commuted to Lexington where I worked at Subway. Can we say damn shitty economy. I was parked across the street at Kroger's. Where they were doing renovations and I picked up a drywall screw. Later when I was working at Lexmark I was getting off the interstate something shredded my rear passenger tire. I was halfway down the road to work before I realized that I could call my supervisor to come help me. We had to drive back towards town to pick up the interstate so we could get off on the exit where the truck was parked.

Then there is the day that prompted the new tires. Just getting ready to get of the interstate towards Winchester and had a blow out. Thought someone's vehicle had a backfire. Until on the exit I couldn't drive the truck with any amount of control. Pulled into the gas station. Shredded tire.

When the guy said, "Road Hazard?" I said, "You betcha!"

Ten on Tuesday

Ten News Stories/Celebrities that You're Tired Of

1) Michael Jackson and his little boys
2) Bennifer – part 1
3) FCC bullshit
4) American Idol stars – except Clarkson, she is hot & talented
5) Ashlee Simpson and her vocal backups
6) Asston Kutcher and Demi Moore
7) The Govenator
8) Bush’s new appointees
9) Bennifer – part 2
10) War in Iraq

Monday, January 17, 2005

Party Like a Rock Star

Now that the caffeine is coursing through my veins, let's talk about this weekend. Lil' Tex told me about a party that another fraternity brother was having. It was good to catch up with some brothers I hadn't seen for awhile. I tell ya though college women keep getting hotter and hotter. I stood in the kitchen and guarded the keg, refilling the cups for the ladies. I chit-chatted with my little brother, who is on Law School, and this chick I have the hots for, Jenny. I was taking it easy since I was going out on Saturday too. I provide I still had it in me and showed all the youngins that the Master can still do a Keg Stand. We finished up the evening at the local burger joint, Tolly-Ho. Or just simply called The Hoe. If it's your first time there someone will let the staff know. See the shout out your name when your food is ready. Everyone makes up names late at night, the crazier the better. But if it's first time you get, "Such-and-such is a Hoe Virgin," and they ring a bell. Everyone hoots and hollers. Plenty fun when you are drunk.

Saturday I was going out for a friend's birthday. Before going out we went to Tomo's, a Japanese restaurant. They have really good entrees but their sushi lacks a little. But then I am spoiled, I have eaten at Morimoto's in Philly. Overall Tomo's is decent, but there are just better places, IMO, in Lexington to get sushi and that atmosphere. But it's walking distance to the Blue Moon. We get to The Moon early to get a prime table. If not we would be standing the rest of the night. Coat checked it was time to Rock & Roll. I didn't get to dance much I was too busy catching up with friends. Somehow I made it out of there with only a $15.00 bar tab. Sweetness. For some reason I was OK to drive, so Jason, his girlfriends, and I rolled to Waffle House. Who doesn't know that? The brief inconvenience of driving drunk people around is that they pay for breakfast. Double sweetness.

We go back to Jason's. We weren't ready to call it a night. We slam a few Jager Bomb's and the three of us watch some soft porn on Showtime. Jason loves to show me porn in High Def. It is mighty nice on a 51" widesreen. Not too long after that my fraternity big brother, Goose, comes home and we go outside to throw darts. I think we added a few more holes into the drywall. Jason's neighbor, Tracy, came over. I never met someone that such a hoe-bag as she is. She is mean as I snake and you tell she starts to have diarrhea at the mouth. After another beer, I was ready for bed. I flipped on G-String Divas on HBO and passed out.

Yet Another Round of Testing

I am a bit exhausted from my weekend of partying. You guys get another set of quizzes while I ramp up this morning. As soon as the caffeine kicks in I will chronicle the weekend.

Starring in:

Hottie of the Week

This week's Hottie is Leah Remini, star of the hit CBS sitcom, King of Queens. She has been on the cover of Maxim and Stuff magazine. Be sure to check out her official site.

Saturday, January 15, 2005 Anthology

For those of you who didn't head my words and go read my post over at

Here are the links to my posts you lazy bastards:
Leaving a Legacy

Facilities @ Work

Weird Science

Happy Birthday Lori

Public Service Annoucement

The PIMP is in Da Hiz-haus


Friday, January 14, 2005

Keys to the Kingdom

My boy Lil'Tex called me last night looking to see if he could come down to Richmond and pre-drink at my place before heading out to Hurricanes. "Dude you don't even have to ask. Just let me know you are coming." He rolls down with his roommate and Superman. Yes that is his Christian name. They do their drinking while I get ready. I had just gotten back from a meeting.

I don't live to far from downtown to we are there in quick as lightning speed. I excuse myself to 21&Up section. I purchase a Jager Bomb. Yummy. Better if you can drop the Jager in the Red Bull like a Boiler Maker. I stoke back over to the dance floor to find my peeps.

Supe being the true player that he is glides down to the dance floor and the ladies flock to him. Tex plays it cool and approaches a lady on the floor. Asks her to dance and is in like Flynn. I tell ya this kid was a smooth operator all night. When the two of them needed a break, he took her to the far end of the bar and was quite chatty with her. He got the digits and invited her to another party tonight.

As for myself the scenery was nice and potential was bountiful but I was there to make sure my boys enjoyed themselves in my kingdom. Big Papa surveyed his PIMPdom and it was good.

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Bleed Blue

Last night I went out with some of my fraternity brothers for our monthly Alumni Club Happy Hour meeting. What does that mean? Usually it means drinking beer and throwing darts. Fellowship. Normally the meeting is the second Tuesday of every month and we go to O'Neil's on Richmond Road, but last night we moved to Wednesday to correspond with the UK game. We went to this place called Shamrock's. Seemed like a nice place. Food was good, but we got the shittiest service ever. Our server seemed to go out of his way not to stop at our table. Then charged me for an extra Amberboch and than had the audacity to argue with me about it. Whatever happened to the customer is always right.

We left at halftime. UK was able to squeak out a win of 69-54. I drove back to Richmond and decided I wasn't done drinking. I proceeded to break into my half case of Rolling Rock from Dennis's Hold'Em Party. I got drunk and watched FART: the Movie. Quite literally a shitty movie but fun to watch.

On another more serious note, my buddy had one of these bracelets.

It's fashioned after Lance Armstrong's "Live Strong" bracelet. A portion of the proceeds goes to the Tubby Smith Foundation, which provides millions of dollars to non-profit ogranizations around the state.

If you bleed blue like a true UK fan be sure to pick one of these up at your local Dawahares.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

I'm Actually Working

I should say kinda working. I don't ever try to hard. Just enough to get by. I have been surfing all morning on those new blog traffic generators. This afternoon I have been doing my call backs and I'm actually getting hold of people. That means I gotta work. So here is BlogThing. My Love Horoscope. Let's hope some of this comes true.

Aquarius 2005 Love Horoscope

After the hectic holidays, you're ready for the New Year your way, and you may want to start by giving yourself some space in the realm of romance. Taking a step back from an existing relationship to look at the big picture isn't a bad idea in January -- and those who are single will be firmly in a 'my way or the highway' mode (a good way to sort efficiently through potential partners). By February 8th, you're electrified by a new vision, whether it's one of reconnecting or starting fresh, and you're electrically attractive as well. Your big heart and grand intentions fuel you at the end of March; just be gentle with anyone you're leaving by the wayside.

Something (or someone) exciting and new comes your way in the days following April 7th, and your charisma is undeniable. You're far from the herd, and other wild cards are easy to pick out (and pick up); if you're coupled up, take your sweetie with you to unusual places. Get into the social swing of things in May and June, when you'll be rewarded with mind- and heart-expanding connections.

The heat of summer might find you slaving away at work instead of enjoying the romantic romps you'd much prefer. Don't get so caught up, however, that you miss the big signals your sweetie or a potential one is sending you -- some progression can occur that's very much to your liking. Schedule hot dates or fabulous getaways around July 21st and August 19th, when your wild appeal is boosted way, way up.

Fall usually gives you that itchy feeling that you'd rather be somewhere else, doing something else or perhaps with someone else, and denying it only makes matters worse. Singles can soar through this season, while couples might plan a great escape together. By Thanksgiving you'll be more grounded, and ready to recognize how thankful you are. Get yourself under the mistletoe the weekend of December 23rd, and prepare for a very happy New Year.

Where is your relationship heading? Get a peek at your future together with a free Romantic Compatibility Reading!

Content provided by

© 1996 - 2005

What Does 2005 Have In Store For You? Get Life, Love, and Career Horoscopes - for Free!

The Wolf is Loose

Well here is another traffic generator for your blog. Enjoy.

BlogClicker is Here

For those of you who have made it here because of BlogExplosion, there is a new kid in town. His name is BlogClicker. He peddles the same wares as BlogExplosion. Ah that sweet smell of Crack in the morning. Get on that bandwagon, party people.

Be sure to help me get my free Photo iPod and you will be one step closer to your own iPod. Click Here.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

Tsunami Survivor

I found this rather touching story over at Yahoo! News.

It's about a baby hippo that has been displaced by the recent tsunami and has befriended a century-old male giant tortoise. The tortoise has becomes the hippo's serogate mother. It's so cute.

Animals are so amazing sometimes. If we take a moment, we can learn so much from them. Like this story. Leave your comments as to what you think it means.

Truth Hurts

Once again I took another one of those quizes. I think it speaks for itself.

You are a Playboy. You perv.

What kind of Sixties Person are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Monday, January 10, 2005

Happy Birthday Lori

Sorry it's late.

Quality Time - part 3

As I'm driving back to my apartment to crash out before going to D&D Minis, I get a call from my brother telling me I have to help him move back into the dorms. Shit why can't Mom and Dad help you. Seems there was a miscommunication between them and my brother and they were in Lexington shopping for a bathroom mirror and were gonna go on a date. How cute? Great. I tell him, "OK. Have you shit packed up and downstairs. I'll pick you up after D&D Minis." Just as I'm getting off the call with my brother my parents call to tell me the same damn thing. "Yeah, Yeah I got it." "Thanks, Mike." Geez.

I get home and put together my warband for this evening tournament. I try a few new things. I got a figure in from eBay that cost me $22, so I wanted to give her a try. Turns out my arch-nemesis and teacher Keith was using the same figure. The Drow Cleric of Lloth, the only Commander 5 for Chaotic Evil. Shit we almost had identical armies. Perseverance and reverence to the Dice Gods prevailed and I won the tournament.

I get to my parent's house and load up my brothers stuff. Thank God he had a friend help move the fish tank. I was dreading that one. You see, it was such a pain last time.

I go home and go to bed early because Mom and Dad convinced me that if go to Sunday School and Church they would take me out to lunch. I never pass up free food, people. Sunday School is being led by the Associate Pastor, Steven Sparks, who will graduating from Asbury Seminary with his Master in Divinity pretty soon. Very cool guy was a highly successful attorney in Mississippi that felt a calling to the ministry and found his way to KY. I think I will enjoy the topics we will be discussing. Some of the hard to answer questions Christians of this generation face. Church was good too, Stephen was preaching.

Then to Casa Fiesta. Gotta love Mexican. I swear they must have put crack in the chips and salsa. I could have just eaten them. Afterwards I went home to watch some movies. I ended up watching 2 movies and the ends of 2 other that I had been meaning to finish. One was "The Last Samurai." All while working on my D20 Modern minis. I have over 50 I need to work on. Ugh.

Quality Time - part 2

We get off at the Hamburg exit wear Old Navy, S&K Menswear, and Victoria's Secret are located. I needed to go to Old Navy to exchange a fleece pullover my sister got me for Christmas. I got a nice polo instead. Let me tell ya if you get anybody anything at Old Navy get a gift receipt since everything always goes on sale you never know what the person paid for it. You could be getting shafted with a sale price on a return when that person paid full price. At S&K I had to get my suits re-altered. My parents bought them for me for a wedding reception I had to go to. I never tried them on before I took them home because there wouldn't have been enough time to fix them anyway. Good thing I had car trouble and couldn't make it. I would have been pissed off that things weren't right. The sleeves in the jacket were still too long and the slacks weren't right either. In the other suit the sleeves weren't as bad and the pants were right, but the suit sat on my body like a moo-moo. They ended up having to take in the center seam and sides of the jacket. My father loves that place but I'm beginning to wonder. Service means a lot to me. Now Victoria's Secret, I promised a friend I would pick something out for her there for Christmas. I told her she should be honored that I am doing this since I told myself no more of this shit. I spent so much money there on my ex-GF. I could have fed a small third world country. My brother said see that. It was some thong with feathers sticking out the back. He said, "That's what that little girl was looking at when Tyler and I walked by Vickie's in the mall." I said, "What I thought you said some old lady." I'm not going to front and old lady for wanting to get her freak on but a little girl . Come on people. No little girl should be wearing Victoria's Secret underwear until she is at least sixteen.

Done with Hamburg we head over to Harrodsburg Road were the Rusty Scabbard is located. Here is a local game shop that has been around for twenty years. It's not my home when I come to Lexington but it's the only place to get Games Workshop stuff. I use their bases to make my minis for D20 Modern. Then we head over to A+ Comics and Collectibles which is my home in Lex to pick up my comics. Well lookie there my Arcee statue has come in. Arcee is the female Autobot from the movie. Definitely looked sharp, but I wasn't looking at paying it in full that day. Oh well.

Now it's off to Best Buy the real reason we made this trip to Lexington. First, we stop off at Fazoli's for a bite to eat. My brother says he wants baked ziti. I said, "How much is that?" He says, "Four seventy-nine." "What! Your sorry ass needs to get the small spaghetti if I'm paying for this." We settled on a small classic ziti. Mmmm. I love fazoli's. How can you go wrong with Italian food.

Best Buy is uneventful other than I parked behind the building, so my brother was bitching about the walk. It makes it a lot easier to get out of the place for sure. It is always so crazy there. We walk in and there is this really cool collector's set for the Matrix Trilogy. I so would have loved that but I already had the three movies and the Animatrix. It just would have been a waste. I had convinced my brother to give me his $20 gift card in place of the $25 he owed me from a couple of months ago. I purchased the Director's Cut of Hellboy and ID4. I got to watch them on Sunday not necessarily worth the extra money but cool none-the-less. I have yet to sit down and watch one of my movies with Director and other cast commentary turned on. Just can never find the time. I hear any one of Kevin Smith's movies are too funny. I got to check out the Apple Photo iPod that I will get for free if I get ten people to sign up for offers.

We head home. On the way out of town we stop at Mona's place to pick up my watch that I left there New Year's. Melissa answered the door and it was 3:30 in the afternoon and she was still in her PJs. What a lazy bitch. Didn't even invite us in.

*** more to come ***

Quality Time - part 1

Friday after work I called my brother up to see if he wanted to get a pizza and watch some movies. We were planning on going to Lexington on Saturday to spend our Best Buy gift cards from our Aunt. He was game. I picked him up from the Wesley Foundation on campus and we rolled over to Giovanni's to get a pie. These guys make a pretty good NY-style pizza. You know super that thin but not crunch flopping all over the place goodness. We got our pizza and headed back to my place. I received my first DVD from Blockbuster Online. I signed up as my part of the Free Photo iPod offer. I got "The Perfect Score," it's about six kids that conspire to steal the answers to the SAT test. It was an OK movie for something that MTV Films help put out. The coolest thing in the film was the underlying theme of relating different moments of the film to what S.A.T. stands for. I leave it up to you to find them.

Then, we attempted to watch "The Last Samurai." We all know this is a great film. I never got to see it in the theater, but my old roommate bought it for me as an apology for not realizing he still had one of my other DVD's. As fate would have it I fell asleep while watching this movie like every other time I sit down to watch it. I covered up the little brother and went to bed myself. Set the alarm clock early so we could get the Post Office as they opened. I had some eBay auctions that had to get in the mail.

8:20 was just too damn early for a Saturday but Andy and I were going to have a busy morning in Lexington. I take a shower and let him sleep since I had to take him home to shower before we went to Lexington. It's like pulling teeth to wake him up in the morning. I used to love when I was living at home after college to run and jump on him to wake him up on Saturdays. I would have done that but I was afraid I would break the futon. The thing isn't too sturdy. Once he was awake we struggled to get all the things we needed to take with us to Lexington into my truck. More on that in a bit. I was in and out at the Post Office. Thanks God that place can be a black hole sometimes.

We go to our parents house so diggle-berry can shower. Mom and Dad were up doing a Bible study. I rummage through the cabinets and find some cereal. I hadn't had Honey Nut Cherrios in a long time. Tasted so good. I proceeded to watch the dog stalk my father while he was studying and eating an English muffin with peanut butter and jelly. Seems she is awarded the last couple of bites and knows this. It was a trip watching her pace back and forth. It never ceases to amaze me how much that dog is driven by food. It's not like we don't feed her.

Finally the lump finishes his shower. He is worse than a woman. Say are goodbyes to our parents and we off. Shit, I'd better get gas. I didn't think a third of a tank will get us around Lex and back. Fill up with some Go-Go Juice and grab a pack of cigarettes and now we are off.

*** more to come ***

Hottie of the Week

I felt it was time that I devote a post to Hottie of the Week. Now you will know if this is some random hoochie I found on the Internet, a celebrity, or maybe a friend of mine. Included in each post will be my thoughts and as much information as possible that I could gather on the week's Hottie. Now with no further ado this week's Hottie or should I say it's time for another Hotties.

These two come to us courtesy of Tasty Blog. It appears that two porn stars are sharing an intimate moment with a lollipop. Oh to be that lollipop. Enjoy.

Friday, January 07, 2005

Destiny Fulfilled

Spank my ass and call me Charlie.

I am so honored to be a guest author on Miss Yano's blog, Yano will be out of town next week because she is going on vacation to CA to go snow boarding. Lucky bitch.

Yano's blog was a big influence for me to start my own. She made it look so easy. My life is ruined now. I jest. But I am sure addicted to blogging now.

I know Yano from message boards. There we are huge fans of Michael Turner's work. Here is Yano and her sister Fatima with Peter Steigerwald.

I get the PIMP persona from the people at Aspen. I love those people dearly.

Hopefully my readers will enjoy my posts at and will continue reading Yano's blog when she returns. I pray I do her blog justice.

Little Gems

Sometimes at work there are little gems that make you smile. Especially in light of the previous post. I remoted into a lady's computer and this is what I saw on her Desktop.

Lookie there, three hot chicks sticking their tongues out. I can't make this shit up. Things like this make the job all that more pleasant. Hope you enjoy this screen capture as much as I have.

Stupid People - part 2

It's time for Stupid People - part 3. Hazily I proceeded to my desk after making the 30 minute commute to work. Damn I have voicemail. It's not pleasant knowing that some dumbass called you after you got off work. This message was from a lady in a different time zone but at work now. I called her got her voicemail. Left a message. She calls me right back. This really pisses the GrimSage off. See when we call no number comes up on Caller ID meaning the Nextel employees don't know It is the Help Desk calling them. It doesn't bother me unless we are busy and everyone and their mother is calling me back and I just want to get my tickets closed out.

I answer the call and bring up the lady's ticket. I ask, "Could you show me exactly what is happening?" I do this when I'm lazy and don't want to decipher the gibberish in the ticket. The lady says, "When I click on a Word document I get duplicates of them. I think I have a virus." She opens up a Word document. Seems nothing out of the ordinary. "See there on the desktop," she says. Oh my God what an idiot! It was the temporary file that is created by all Microsoft Office applications for use with the AutoSave feature. She had her Hidden Files enabled. It took me 10 minutes to explain to that this was supposed to happen. I showed her, "See when you close Word it goes away." "How'd you do that." Once again I had to explain to her how the AutoSave feature worked. I still don't think she got it but I got her off the phone .

Now I was over at michele and she has been doing posts that make her reads comment on their thoughts. Today's was, "If you had a Red Button on your desk, 'What would it do?'" My prompt answer was, "It would open a gate to the fiery pits of Hell whenever I felt the need to punish a Stupid Person." Although , I'm afraid I would be damning a lot of people to Hell. Comment on what your Button would do.

Thursday, January 06, 2005

Anal Dwelling Butt Monkey

You Are From Uranus

You shine with brilliant creativity, and you're more than a little eccentric.
You love everything unusual and shocking. You're one far-out chick or dude.
Anything unconventional excites you - and you have genius potential.
Just don't let your rebel side get the best of you, or else you'll alienate everyone.
Your original thinking and funky attitude is all you need to be you.

WTF? I'm from Uranus. That's right your anus. It doesn't matter that the decription matches me. I'm from Uranus. Damn these Blogthings. Leave your chuckles in the comments.

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Coffee Flavored Coffee

For all those who like hazelnut, fluffy bunny coffee this post is for you too.

I was over at All Things Jennifer and she had a crummy day because she left her fresh brewed mug of java at home. Made me reminisce about my first day at EDS.

I rolled in to the center and was directed to a back conference room where we all gathered our chairs into a circle. Katie, the Kelly Services lady, gave us all plastic coffee mugs. I run back to the break room for some caffeine. I was feeling real rough that day. I wasn't used to having to be at work at eight on the dot. My old job at Lexmark had flex time where I could come in anytime between seven and nine and all I had to do was work my eight hours. About the only nice thing about that job.

It was my first time in the break room and survey my surroundings. There were two big machines that must brew a thousand gallons at a time. I jest but they are pretty big. Then there was a little intuitional machine that has the glass carafes. I'm looking around trying to figure out why they have this little guy when there are two big ones right beside. I'm thinking decaf but none of the carafes had orange handles. For those not savvy in coffee making etiquette that means decaf and brown means "full on I need to wake up" caffeine. I poured some coffee from the little guy thinking it would be fresher. Stirred in my customary two sugars. Tasted pretty good.

I sat in training bored to tears as most people would be during that first day when you are just going over the obvious basics. For the life of me I couldn't wake up. I tried my best. More coffee. Constant movement in the chair. And even trying to pay attention and contribute. Nothing. I had 4 cups of coffee that day that half way through the afternoon I had to piss like a race horse. I was ecstatic when five o'clock rolled around. I had enough.

The next day I zombie-walk to the break room and low-and-behold there was a big ass sign that said. Wait for it. DECAF. How in the hell did I miss that. In my mind I shouted, "Fuck!"

Be sure to check out Dennis Leary's "Rescue Me" on FX. Season Two starting soon.

Fuck Me Running

Grab the lube people, I'm ranting. I told myself I wouldn't comment on the tsunami disaster. I think it's a tragedy and relief should be given. I have a desire to keep my blog free of any political edges. It seems to incite peoples emotions. I feel it's my duty to come to the defensive of the Reverend Dubya and The Church of Dysfucntion. On his blog he posted his feelings on the tsunami and how the world views the US meddling in foreign affairs. Many agree and many disagree. I happen to agree that I think the US should stop begin Big Brother and take care of it's own people. We send millions of tons of food to starving countries but we have starving people here too.

Everyone that has a blog wants to share a bit about themselves to the rest of cyberspace. Let's be nice and not attack each other. The Internet is the frontier of tolerance among all races, creeds, religion, and shapes. If you agree, comment why you agree. If you disagree, comment with a rebuttal. Don't post something to this effect, "Educate yourself then write a blog. Then email me and maybe I’ll read your babble again." It plainly makes you look ignorant.

I am reminded that everyone has two things they can call their own: an asshole and an opinion. Some people just don't know how to use either right.

More Rounds of Testing

Once again I was over at Mooley's World reading about his cracked vision on matters of his life. I'm not saying that I disagree with anything he is saying. Simply put our own versions of how we see things are always warped and biased. Don’t you think? But anyway. Seems some of my fellow co-workers on the Tier 1 Help Desk have been enjoying the random personality test found on the Internet. I definitely think they are a great way to waste time and tell people who read my blog a little bit about who I am. I try to be as honest as possible when I answer the bizarre questions formatted to fit the theme of the test. Below you will find some tests geared towards computer geeks. Enjoy.

You are .exe When given proper orders, you execute them flawlessly.  You're familiar to most, and useful to all.
Which File Extension are You?

You are Windows XP.  Under your bright and cheerful exterior is a strong and stable personality.  You have a tendency to do more than what is asked or even desired.
Which OS are You?

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

I want a FREE iPod

Well I have been at a lost for words to write all day. I was over at MoreThanWords reading about how she was devastated that she lost her FREE iPod. I inquired how she got the iPod for FREE. She told me here story and how she is trying again but for the 40GB version. Since she is so kind as to read my blog I thought I would help her out and followed her referral link.

I have now taken the first step needed to get my own FREE iPod. Please help me out on this quest. Just click my referral link:

I'll keep everyone updated as the referrals come in.

Ten on Tuesday

Ten Things You Look Forward to Doing in 2005

1) Origins 2005
2) GenCon 2005
3) Fridays at Keeneland with my brother
4) Going back to school to be a teacher
5) Possible comic-con to see some of my Aspen friends
6) Free iPod from
7) Getting hired on with EDS
8) Healthy relationship with a caring woman
9) Kick ass birthday party
10) More partying in 2005

Monday, January 03, 2005

The Year is 2005

We have made it through another year. Hope everyone had a wonderful New Year's Eve. I had a blast. A week into December I was asking around trying to find something to do. Couldn't find a thing. The week of New Year's I said, "Fuck it. Something will come up and I'll be ready." My best friend, Whitney, called me on Thursday asking me what I was doing. I said, "Absolutely nothing." She said, "Good, we are going to Avio." Rock on. Avio is an upscale nightclub in Lexington, KY with a dress code. It's a concept of having 5 different bars in one: Sports Bar, Dance Club, Karaoke, Rock, and an Outdoor Beach Volleyball.

I arrived at Whitney's friend, Mona's, place. The girls had made a sweet spread of food. Whitney poured me a glass of champagne, and I made short work of the stuffed mushrooms that were left. The boys were playing Super Smash Brother Melee. They asked me to join in, I said, "I would just embarrass myself." Every finished getting pimped out and we took some pictures. Always have to have those Before pictures.

We roll up to Avio and Mona works with the owner's fiancé. Can we say VIP? Walked right in and didn't have to pay the $15 cover. Phat to the max. The nine of us danced in the New Year and beyond. After three Maker's and Coke I was quite toasty. We went out the volleyball court to cool off. It started to drizzle. Very refreshing. We chatted with the owner and his fiancé. Nice people. We were tired and headed back to Mona's.

The boys devoured what food was left before we went out. The guys then played Mario Kart Double Dash until four in the morning. It's always interesting playing a driving game while inebriated. Much hilarity and cursing insued. The girls made beds for the guys that did have significant others and we all retired. In the morning the girls made us chocolate chip pancakes. They were the bomb. Thanks Mona.
The boys played more Mario Kart. Finally I drove back to Richmond at around three in the afternoon.

It's good to ring the New Year in with friends. And the best of all the PIMP might have a lady friend to hang out with.